Paranormal State

so... i have this friend her name is Breanna. She's a BadassBitch and i love her with all my heart. recently i told her my past through a letter. she read it once in front of me and another time at home, she cried. but i've never seen her cry. she's seen me cry.
she, in response to my letter, wrote me one also, one of the lines says "You are beautiful inside and out" when i read that i cried. i've always felt otherwise and been told otherwise. i met Breanna last year but it feels like i've known her for a lifetime. she tells me to stay true to myself because i tell her things that i don't tell my Mum or Kristen. sooooooo she's kind of a big deal.
But Breanna,
it's you who is beautiful inside and out, you are funny, Beautiful, smart and THE BEST GUITAR PLAYER EVERRRRRRRRR! hehhehe I love you! And always will, no matter what happens.

Grape Juice

I think I'm in love with Lee Pace fuck the other dude. and Kristen's gonna be there for that magical moment. just sayin :p

Currently listening to: Crash-Gwen Stefani

Tropical Colada

HEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHE!!!!!!! thisssss week. was and is almost over. so was sick today and it sucked. stayed home from school. then when school was out i walked over to my friends as they were walking home. hahhahah! God, I love them. so. reeally excited to get this new book! i've wanted it for hellaaaa days. ummmm i can't believe how fast this year has gone. it's almost over. damn. best years of my life 2009-2010. hehehhe!
It's also the first official day of fall. i try not to let go of my friends. they mean soooooooo much to me. they make me smile,laugh and best of all love. wow. i have the most boring life in the world. also currently trying out a "new" hairstyle. well it's not exactly new. i just kinda don't brush it after i get out of the shower. sooo ya.
but it's cute it just gives me my natural waves.


Currently Listening To: The Ocean-Tegan And Sara

Goodbye Forever and Always

It's time to go to bed forever and ever. i think i broke a leg. under so much pressure all the sudden. my teeth hurt my body aches to many whores around school. it's totally over between us. fuck it.i'm done. it's over. ow that hurt my heart. -crycrycry- i wish i had a fast forward button so this could be over and done with. maybe i really did get that cancer i talked about. alone just like always. don't know what to do anymore don't know what to say anymore don't know who to talk to anymore. but i'm tired of crying and complaining. people always tell me to be happy and to "move on" well i can't help that i'm depressed it's in my blood. all i can do is be myself around people but, it feels like they still have no fucking idea who i am. so i'm going to try and move on from that boy i fell in love with. although just typing that killed me inside a lot. goodbye you've all been very nice.

Currently Listening to: the antlers-sylvia

Offers the Best.

SOOOOOOOOO I have really good news!!!! turns out He isn't moving!!!!! Today was the first day of school and i saw him all day!!!!!! And he hugged me like the moment I saw him. His hugs are some of the best in the world and he hugged me for a long time i didn't complain i missed him and his scent and his face and plainly him.*long sigh* ohhh once again he was always on my mind. hehhhhhehehehhehe. Today was the first day of school! i want this year to go by kinda slow this will be my last year with him and most of my friends.breathe in breathe out.have a nice night!

Currently Listening to "Oh My Sweet Carolina"-Ryan Adams

La Bamba

Is there ever a time when ur heart feels like it's sinking? Like when you hear bad news. like when Ritchie Valens died. anyway "holiday" was horrible not worth typing.
but i stayed with my grandparents for a week in Salinas! love them soooo much! i love Salinas too.and stayed with my sister too! i love her more than the world! anyway. orientation sucked too. who cares one day i'll be far away from everyone and i'll live alone and won't be bothered. i walked by his house today with my dog my dog stopped on his lawn my heart skipped a few beats.i miss him.sometimes i wish i never became "friends" with him because he just takes up a lot of my thinking space.but then again when were not ditching doorbells or pissing people off or having deep conversations about each other, then, fuck me dude. but he's gone and out of my life forever.lets hope not.anyway Kristen's birthday is coming up soon age 15.fun fun!ooooh in San Francisco I found the apartment that one day i want to live in.its on top of this liquor store in one of the most dangerous places in San Francisco.i live my life on the edge bro.ssssssssoooooo i really hate the smell of cigarettes but weirdly i love the smell of marijuana it's relaxing.goodnight

Stay Strong,Cheyenne Rose Castro
Currently listening to "Just the way you are"-Bruno Mars

Late?

So uhhhhhhhhhh been really lazy.tomorrow I leave to go on my uhh "holiday" in San Francisco. uhhhhh. hung out with my sister-in-law yesterday. it was a lot of fun. first we went to the mall then Hayden my niece started freaking out(she's only 4 months) then we left and drove around for a while looking for a place to eat. We tried "La Bou" and there was this hella long line. Then we ended up getting mexican food that i'm still finishing. hahah. and then we talked for a long time it was fun. :D
uhh the day before that which was wedensday there was an internet fight that this boy statred with me. hahahhahahahhaha. he's lame. but whatever. ummm so i'm hungry. probably going to finish my Mexican food haahhaha. anyway. i spent all night packing and putting on outfits that i'm going to be wearing to San Francisco I put on all of them. i'm really excited for the cold because i mostly have winter/fall clothes anyway. (you see I'm not fit for Sacramento it's always hot)...... uhhh going stalking today. later though. hahhahahah. anyway.

Stay Strong, With Love, Cheyenne Rose Castro,
En train d'écouter = Shwayze-vous rentrerez chez vous. <--- French :DDD
Currently listening to=Shwayze-Get You Home.<---- English :D

Bubble Gum.

Not much happened today.the town sucks.But I slept till like 4p.m. then took a shower and laid down for a little longer. I was ssssssssoooooooo tired still am. i plan on going to bed after this.tomorrow or later today i'm going to my sister in law's mum's house.we're making a fruit platter.uhhhhh don't know what else to say,i have to do hella laundry then my room will be clean.:D ummmmmm don't feel very good. but that comes and goes I probably have cancer.:p. oh well. so i hope everyone is having a good weekend. and I wish i had some chocolate.yes yes that would be good:D.Well goodnite go do something else.

Currently Listening to Shwayze=Corona and Lime :D <33333

My Cities My Homes My Dreams

So i wanted to write again because I got really bored and blah. So in my other post i mentioned that I'm going to San Francisco for a week. i'm so damn excited. the first time i remember going there I was in like first grade.i was told i've been there before though i think but anyway, i remember sitting in between my brother and sister and saw that we were approaching the Bay Bridge I got scared and said "I don't want to go on the bridge" or something like that i'm pretty sure they laughed but then my brother pulled me towards him and hugged me <3 :D, all the way till we got off the bridge it was the sweetest thing ever.(i was really afraid of bridges when i was little) then we just explored the city all day. But now the bridge doesn't scare me i actually like going over it now because i know right over it is "my city by the bay". But ever since I remember going there when i was little i have treasured that place. a few years ago i even lived there not for very long but i did.don't feel like talkin about it too lazy.but i promised myself that one day i was going to live there.and i did but now that i'm older that's the only place i want to be sometimes. and it's not because my dad lives there it's because it's so full of life and there's things to do there for any age unlike nasty Sacramento where you can't do shit unless your 21 or older.like i said before, the first chance i get i'm out of this piece of shit city. i plan on living in France for a while when i'm older. and also i want my profession to be an RN(Registered Nurse)it's not what i dreamed of being and it still isn't but to me it is the next best thing.and a french major. But San Francisco man, great place to be:D
The Castro is a nice place to be I've driven through it several times.i plan on moving there when i'm older and permanently living in Canada I've wanted to since I was 7 or 8.when i get there next weekend i plan on telling my dad to take me to see the "painted ladies" you know those houses in a row that are in like every movie ever filmed there? ya those one's.one of the best times i ever had there was when we drove deep deep on the city and looked at all these weird buildings in San Fran at nite like we saw these modern bars but the walls were glass and nightclubs with bright lights people in oddly dressed clothing.FUCKIN' AMAZING. another reason I love this place is the beach i mean the beach has been my favorite place to be since i could remember. i could sit in the sand all day and just watch the waves and not get bored although the ocean has almost killed me a few times i'm up for the beach all the time.but who knows maybe i won't do any of those things. but like someone told me earlier "Just follow your heart" which is what i'm going to do and i encourage everyone to do that too.well sorry to bore you so go do something else.

currently listening to Dashboard Confessional=Stolen

WOW

So not really sure if anyone is going to really read this. if not who cares.it'll be kinda like a journal. So i'm not gonna rant about my life I'm just going to talk about all the shit that goes on in my life...So here I go.

So I'm going to my Dad's soon (if you know me you know my Dad's and I's history) he lives in San Francisco i love that place sooooooo much.But let's just say i've been pretty low lately.so there's this boy i like he's like my best friend and ever since he told me what he was doing soon i've been pretty sad. he's the reason for my happiness and my pain. stupid right? i know. that's why i kept it a secret. but really i just don't give a fuck anymore.so whatever.also back to my dad.well let's just say he's not the best person.everyone in my family hates him which is understandable.i feel so bad everytime i see him i feel like i'm hurting everyone but i just also can't do anything right so fuck it.well i guess i'll say a few words about me. i'm weird, personally i think i listen to the best music ever,i have really good friends,a great family,but i don't like being around people very much(although the other day i got really lonely which never happens)my life is a winding road.i live in sacramento which is probably one of the worst cities ever.the first chance i get i'm outta here.sometime's i swear i have multiple personality disorder or what ever it's called and sometimes a bit bipolar which scares me.another reason i don't like being around people i don't like hurting people or being rude to them so if they're with me long enough i just know i'm going to end up hurting them which sucks.although everyone i've met says i'm a great person which is really nice:D.so i'll write more later i mean it's only my first blog:p.